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Artist: Xzibit f/ Trena Joiner
Album:  Napalm
Song:   1983
Typed by: jostmatt at bluewin dot ch (w/ help from liner notes)

[ Trena Joiner ]
I think we all have our moments in our lives
where we say or do things
And we're so sorry for them, really
It's not the way we would have wanted it to come out
Um... let's face it, this is real life
And this is the thought that was captured from me
That words only share a small portion of the vision that they give witness to

[ Xzibit ]
I had to write this in blood, because the ink wouldn't stick
I sold five or six million but yo, that ain't really shit
It was supposed to be different, we was supposed to ride out
But Too Much shot his girl, then shot himself in the mouth
Then the Steady Game formed but very soon fell apart
Cause when you're just doin art with no loyalty in your heart
It's like catchin Alzheimer's, all these niggas forgettin where they comin from
Had to slow it down, wait a minute, what we runnin from?
This is what we supposed to do, here's where we supposed to be
I hated MTV for tryin to play me like a mockery
But that don't bother me, I just fulfill my fuckin contract
Small price to pay just to get your peace of mind back (mind back)
Backfire, assassination of my character
Just to make some millions off America
My younger sister Erica just adopted a child
My older brother served 15, he made it out
Even though my father love me I ain't seen him in a while
Had to fight my baby mama, bitch, gimme my nigga now
Cause he's runnin out of time and I need him to understand
The way of the superior man, I built a brand
Niggas talk about my taxes, I done paid Uncle Sam
I'm survivin cause the mind's eye is quicker than the hand

[ Trena Joiner ]
Feet outgrew shoes
Racism outgrew tolerances
And the city glowed at night with the fires of rage
Unconsciousness gave way to consciousness
People and martyrs lived out their lives and deaths on the 6 o'clock news
And we, me and my brothers and my sisters
went our own ways, discovering our own truths, our own pain, our own love

[ Xzibit ]
Heartbreak, disappointment
My mother died when I was nine, I just wanted to join her
'Nah Mr. Joiner, you get to California
I got somethin for you to do' - it's like I was annointed
Resurrected, found my purpose
I remember meetin Dre, bein nervous when I would kick my verses
I was virtually worthless, my whole life was a circus
I was sleepin with serpents and I thought it is worth it
I got a call from Paul, told me shit wasn't workin
Exchanged words, I told him tell me that shit in person
He probably told Em, and by the way that did he said it
Unapologetic, twisted, made it about him
I seen Slim and he said he didn't recognize me
Was it that or did he let another man define me?
I don't know, but now I gotta get this all behind me
Follow my callin when I used to follow niggas blindly

[ Trena Joiner ]
I don't buy my children designer clothes
because I don't want them looking under their arms
or on their behinds to find out who they are

[ Xzibit ]
I wish I had a better relationship with my uncles
Blood relatives I could turn to when I'm feelin troubled
And talk about my struggles; my uncle John'L
He only put me on the phone with different females
'Yeah this is such a such, nephew, tell her what's up'
Ain't even ask about Tremayne and Gatlyn growin up
Fuck, I drink it all and I smash the bottle
Self-medicated, numb, but I'ma feel it tomorrow
It feel like pain and sorrow was like a second skin
But now that pain is gone I got my second win
Only the strong live long, you better settle in
I'm fightin forever, I will never let the devil win
1983, that's when my journey begins
I searched everywhere for strength and only found it within
This for me and my kin, still dyin to live
Livin life to the fullest 'till I see you again

[ Trena Joiner ]
I'd love it if I could have, um, one of those
Woo-oooh-oooh-ooooooh's underneath
Ahm, just for that one part
And as you go into something else