Artist: Xzibit f/ Trena Joiner Album: Napalm Song: 1983 Typed by: jostmatt at bluewin dot ch (w/ help from liner notes) [ Trena Joiner ] I think we all have our moments in our lives where we say or do things And we're so sorry for them, really It's not the way we would have wanted it to come out Um... let's face it, this is real life And this is the thought that was captured from me That words only share a small portion of the vision that they give witness to [ Xzibit ] I had to write this in blood, because the ink wouldn't stick I sold five or six million but yo, that ain't really shit It was supposed to be different, we was supposed to ride out But Too Much shot his girl, then shot himself in the mouth Then the Steady Game formed but very soon fell apart Cause when you're just doin art with no loyalty in your heart It's like catchin Alzheimer's, all these niggas forgettin where they comin from Had to slow it down, wait a minute, what we runnin from? This is what we supposed to do, here's where we supposed to be I hated MTV for tryin to play me like a mockery But that don't bother me, I just fulfill my fuckin contract Small price to pay just to get your peace of mind back (mind back) Backfire, assassination of my character Just to make some millions off America My younger sister Erica just adopted a child My older brother served 15, he made it out Even though my father love me I ain't seen him in a while Had to fight my baby mama, bitch, gimme my nigga now Cause he's runnin out of time and I need him to understand The way of the superior man, I built a brand Niggas talk about my taxes, I done paid Uncle Sam I'm survivin cause the mind's eye is quicker than the hand [ Trena Joiner ] Feet outgrew shoes Racism outgrew tolerances And the city glowed at night with the fires of rage Unconsciousness gave way to consciousness People and martyrs lived out their lives and deaths on the 6 o'clock news And we, me and my brothers and my sisters went our own ways, discovering our own truths, our own pain, our own love [ Xzibit ] Heartbreak, disappointment My mother died when I was nine, I just wanted to join her 'Nah Mr. Joiner, you get to California I got somethin for you to do' - it's like I was annointed Resurrected, found my purpose I remember meetin Dre, bein nervous when I would kick my verses I was virtually worthless, my whole life was a circus I was sleepin with serpents and I thought it is worth it I got a call from Paul, told me shit wasn't workin Exchanged words, I told him tell me that shit in person He probably told Em, and by the way that did he said it Unapologetic, twisted, made it about him I seen Slim and he said he didn't recognize me Was it that or did he let another man define me? I don't know, but now I gotta get this all behind me Follow my callin when I used to follow niggas blindly [ Trena Joiner ] I don't buy my children designer clothes because I don't want them looking under their arms or on their behinds to find out who they are [ Xzibit ] I wish I had a better relationship with my uncles Blood relatives I could turn to when I'm feelin troubled And talk about my struggles; my uncle John'L He only put me on the phone with different females 'Yeah this is such a such, nephew, tell her what's up' Ain't even ask about Tremayne and Gatlyn growin up Fuck, I drink it all and I smash the bottle Self-medicated, numb, but I'ma feel it tomorrow It feel like pain and sorrow was like a second skin But now that pain is gone I got my second win Only the strong live long, you better settle in I'm fightin forever, I will never let the devil win 1983, that's when my journey begins I searched everywhere for strength and only found it within This for me and my kin, still dyin to live Livin life to the fullest 'till I see you again [ Trena Joiner ] Alvin I'd love it if I could have, um, one of those Woo-oooh-oooh-ooooooh's underneath Ahm, just for that one part And as you go into something else