Artist: mc chris Album: Rare Trax Song: Beetlejuice (a/k/a Secret Song) Typed by: OHHLA Webmaster DJ Flash {"It's show time!"} [mc chris] I'm deadly pale, bad breath, bad teeth Hate the sand and the sun, never see me at the beach I'll stick with goth chicks transfixed on death That wear black britches I insist on nice breasts I sleep in a grave, lived through the Black Plague Actually that's my fault, but don't Wiki that 'kay? Green hair downstairs, boogers, farts, and phlegm That's my stock in trade, see me startin trends Black and white striped suit or a blood-red tux Got jack on my hand, in Japan it's a must I can change shapes, do pranks, and disguises Bio-exorcist, I'm the best in a crisis Parents wanted me to clean up like my brother Boss used to say I didn't work well with others Now I'm independent and my methods are effective Say my name three times if you want to get connected [Chorus: repeat 2X] Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, one, two, three I like a little lady named Lydia Deetz Her demeanor is depressed, I confess, that's sweet Don't try to deny, she's my bride-to-be [mc chris] Hey K-Mart shoppers, there's a sale on my services I'm here to help there's no need for your nervousness I'll eat what you wanna eat, swallow what you say Relieve you of the living that are ruining your day Have you read the handbook for the recently deceased? It's too thick, like my dick, when I think of little Deetz She's the key to my release from this model existence Coffin lining's confining and I want out this instant Me and the Dragster of Doom, we're the baddest of dudes We hit the Inferno Room where the ladies get nude But we're eternally screwed, so I become a bridegroom and get little Lydia to lip-sync an "I do" I must move the Maitlands out of my way Give 'em zipper lips, pitch a plate on their face Say "Hello" to hammer-hands, say "Goodbye" to Goulet Then off to F-L-A, where my review drew raves Shrimp-glove faceplant, we like cassettes, not 8-track Clown face, much like, the ones you see in "Dark Knight" Being dead, kinda sucks, the afterlife's no fun to us I'm the name that people trust, the juice that comes from beetle guts [movie dialogue] Ah well, I attended Julliard I'm a graduate of the Harvard business school I travel quite extensively I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that I've seen The Exorcist about a hundred and sixty-seven times and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it! [Chorus] [Outro] Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice {*3X*} B-b-b-b-Beetlejuice {"The fun has just begun"}