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Artist: The Lonely Island 
Album:  Turtleneck & Chain
Song:   Rocky
Typed by:

[The Lonely Island]
Ummmm, here's a little story that I think you'll like
It's not about Shaq, or Iron Mike
So buckle ya seatbelts, it's gonna get choppy
and listen to the tale of the time I fought Rocky
One day me and all my friends were hangin'
Talkin' 'bout which of the girls was most bangin
Then one friend says, "You know who's really tough?
"Rocky" (Hit me home!) "..the boxer." 
Man, I said, "Yeah I know him, what about him?" He said, 
"He's really tough" "No way man, I'm callin ya bluff
"I think that I can take him and, to prove my point,
"I'll challenge him in public" (YEAH, THAT'S THE JOINT~!)
So the very next day, stayed true to my word
And I snuck on T.V., so I could be heard
I said, "Rocky, if you're out there, I think you're a nerd
and I'll lick you and bury you like a dog turd!"
I got kicked out, but the candle was lit
'Cause the people had to know if my claim was legit
It made the headlines and I got the call
It was Rocky ("Hey"), and he wanted to brawl
We negotiated terms and set the date
Then I went into training to add some muscle weight
While I punched on meat in a rickety shack
He was sippin on wine, having models rub his back
At the weigh-in, boy the tension was high!
Me and Rock, toe-to-toe and eye-to-eye
I talked some trash, we got pulled apart
I shot him one last look to strike fear in his heart
Skip ahead, the big night was finally here
My body was ripped and my mind was clear
We entered the arena to the roar of the crowd
People chantin my name, I never FELT so proud
Faced off once more in the center of the ring
Touched gloves, said a prayer and the bell went {*ding*}
He hit me with a left and shattered my face
and a right sent my teeth all over the place
Then another great punch caved in my eye socket
He broke my jaw and my trainer yelled, "Stop it!"
But nobody heard him and he crushed my ribs
Blood sprayed off my face and onto some kids
They yelled out ("MORE!") and Rocky obliged
I had to think of some way to turn the tides
So I lean back to hit him with all of my might
Took a swing, but he caught me with a sucker punch-right
Then a sucker punch-left and a sucker punch-right
then twenty-two consecutive sucker punch-rights~!
He tore off my arms, and beat me with 'em
Then threw acid in my face, which obscured my vision
He kicked me in the leg, and fractured my shin
The bone splinter shot right out of my skin
People barfed in the crowd, they were going insane!
and Rocky punched my nose-bone into my brain
I was quiverin and twitchin when I soiled my shorts
Then Rocky pissed on me! (Customary in sports)
The doctor came out and pronounced me dead
and that was the night I fought Rocky!