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Artist: LL Cool J
Album:  Bigger and Deffer
Song:   I'm Bad
Typed by: OHHLA Webmaster DJ Flash

(Calling all cars, calling all cars...)
(Be on the lookout for a tall light-skinned brother with dimples)
(Wearing a black kangol, sweatsuit, gold chain, and sneakers)
(Last seen on Farmers Boulevard headed east)
(Alias L.L. Cool J)
(He's bad...)

No rapper can rap quite like I can
I'll take a musclebound man and put his face in the sand
Not the last Mafioso I'm a MC cop
Make you say "Go LL," and do the wop
If you think you can outrhyme me, yeah boy I bet
Cause I ain't met a motherfucker who can do that yet
Trendsetter I'm better my rhymes are good
I got a gold name plate that says I wish you would
And when rap begin then I gotta join in and
Before my rhyme is over, you know I'ma win
Cool J has arrived so you better make way
Ask anybody in the crowd they say the kid don't play!
Slaughter competition, that's my hobby and job
I don't wear a disguise because I don't owe the mob
Got a pinpoint rap that makes you feel trapped
So many girls on my jock, I think my phone is tapped
I'm bad

(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(C C C C Cool J J)
(Cool J)
(C C C C C C C Cool J J J J J)

I'm like Tyson, icin' I'm a soldier at war
I'm makin' sure you don't try to battle me no more
Got concrete rhymes, been rappin' for ten years and
Even when I'm braggin, I'm bein' sincere!
MC's can't win I make 'em rust like tin
They call me Jaws, my hat is like a shark's fin
Because I'm bad as can be, got my voice on wax
Some brothers think he's making records now he must have relaxed
I couldn't, I shouldn't, and it'll stay that way
The best rapper you've heard, is LL Cool J
Kamikaze take a look at what I've done
Used to rock in my basement now I'm number one
And can happen on time, never standin' on line
You wanna try me first? You better learn how to rhyme
I'm the pinnacle that means I reign supreme
And I'm notorious; I'll crush you like a jelly bean!
I'm bad

I eliminate punks, cut 'em up in chunks
You were souped, you heard me, and your ego shrunk
I'm devastating I'm so good it's a shame
Cause I eat rappers like a cannibal they call me insane
I'm as strong as a bull of course you know I am pull
I enjoy what I'm doing plus I'm paid in full
Not Buckaroo Banzai, but bustin' out as I
Say the kind of rhymes that make MC's with that I'd die
Never retire or put my mike on the shelf
The baddest rapper in the history of rap itself
Not bitter or mad, just provin' I'm bad
You want a hit give me a hour plus a pen and a pad!
MC's retreat, cause they know I can beat 'em
And eat 'em in a battle and the ref won't cheat 'em
I'm the baddest! Takin' out all rookies
So forget Oreos eat Cool J coookies, I'm bad!

(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J)
(Cool J J J)
(Cool J J J)
(C Cool J)

Never ever no never
Never wearin' no Levis, battle me why try?
I'll treat you like a stepchild so tell mommy bye bye
Slaughterin MC's and I'ma never get whipped
When I retire I'll get worshipped like a old battleship
LL I'm bad other rappers know
When I enter the center they say, "Yo, yo there he go!"
My paycheck's large Mr. Bogart in charge
Not a puncher or hunter from a raccoon lodge
The original Todd, teachin' how to be hard
Take the skin off a snake, and split a pea from a pod
You're a novice I'm noble and I decipher my tongue
Not Atilla the Hun, but no I'm Threwler his son
My vocals' exact, like rack and pinion in a Jag
You try to brag, you get your rhymes from a grab-bag
No good scavenger, catfish vulture
My tongue's a chisel in this composition sculpture, I'm bad!

(Think I'm gonna need backup)
(Think I'm gonna need backup)

Gimme that boy, get funky!
Yo this is LL Cool J
And you'll never catch me so don't even try it
Cause I'm too bad for ya, understand?!
Aaaaaahhhh... I'm bad!