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Artist: Eminem
Album:  The Marshall Mathers LP 2
Song:   Rap God
Typed by: 

[Intro: various audio clips]
"Look, I was gonna go easy on you and not to hurt your feelings, but.."
"I'm only going to get this one chance."
"Something's wrong, I can feel it."
"It's just, a feeling I've got, like something's about to happen, but I don't know what."
"If that means what I think it means, we're in trouble, big trouble.
 And if he is as bananas as you say, I'm not taking any chances."
"You were just what the doc ordered!"

[Eminem over Intro]
Six minutes, six minutes, chka, six minutes
Six minutes Slim Shady you're on
Chka-chk, chk-chk-on, chka-chk-chk-on
Six minutes, for six
For six minutes Slim Shady you're on
Chka-chk, on, chka-chk, on, chka-chk-chk

[Chorus: Eminem]
I'm beginnin to feel like a Rap God, Rap God
All my people from the front to the back nod, back nod

Now who thinks their arms are long enough to slap box, slap box?
They said I rap like a robot, so call me Rapbot
But for me to rap like a computer must be in my genes/jeans, I got a laptop in my back pocket

My pen'll go off when I half-cock it, got a fat knot from that rap profit
Made a livin and a killin off it, ever since Bill Clinton was still in office
with Monica Lewinsky feelin on his nut-sack, I'm an MC still as honest
But as rude and as indecent as all hell, syllables, skill-a-holic - kill 'em all with
this flippity dippity hippity hip-hop, you don't really wanna get into a pissin match with this rappidy rap
Packin a Mac in the back of the Ac', backpack rap crap, yap-yap yackety-yack
And at the exact same time I attempt these lyrical acrobat stunts, while I'm practicin that
I'll still be able to break a motherfuckin table over the back of a couple of faggots and crack it in half
Only realized it was ironic I was signed to Aftermath after the fact
How could I not blow? All I do is drop F-bombs, feel my wrath of attack
Rappers are havin a rough time period, here's a maxi pad
It's actually disastrously bad, for the wack while I'm masterfully constructin this masterpiece yeah


Now who thinks their arms are long enough to slap box, slap box?
Let me show you maintainin this shit ain't that hard, that hard
Everybody want the key and the secret to rap immortality like I have got

Well to be truthful the blueprint's, simply rage and youthful excuberance
Everybody loves to root for a nuisance
Hit the Earth like an asteroid and did nothin but shoot for the moon since (pyoon!)
MC's get taken to school with this music cause I use it
as a vehichle to +Bus-the Rhyme+, now I +Lead a New School+ full of students
Me? I'm a product of Rakim, Lakim Shabazz, 2Pac, N.-
-W.A, Cube, hey Doc, Ren, Yella, Eazy, thank you, they got Slim
inspired enough to one day grow up, blow up and be in a position
to meet Run-D.M.C. and induct them into the motherfuckin Rock 'N
Roll Hall of Fame, even though I'll walk in the church and burst in a ball of flames
Only Hall of Fame I'll be inducted in is the alco-hol of fame on the wall of - shame
You fags think it's all a game, 'til I +Walk-a Flock-of Flames+
off a plank and, tell me what in the fuck are you thinkin?
Little gay lookin boy, so gay I can barely say it with a straight face lookin boy (haha)
You're witnessin a massacre/mass-occur like you're watchin a church gatherin take place lookin boy
"Oy vey, that boy's gay," that's all they say lookin boy
You get a thumbs up, pat on the back and a "way to go" from your label every day lookin boy
Hey lookin boy, what ya say lookin boy? I get a "hell yeah" from Dre lookin boy
I'ma work for everything I have, never asked nobody for shit, get out my face lookin boy
Basically boy, you're never gonna be capable of keepin up with the same pace lookin boy


The way I'm racin around the track call me NASCAR, NASCAR
Dale Earnhardt of the trailer park, the white trash God
Kneel before General Zod, this planet's Krypton, no Asgard, Asgard

So you be Thor and I'll be Odin, you rodent, I'm omni-potent
Let off then I'm reloadin immediately with these bombs I'm totin
And I should not be woken
I'm the walkin dead but I'm just a talkin head, a zombie floatin, but I got your mom deep-throatin
I'm out my Ramen noodle, we have nothin in common poodle
I'm a Doberman, +Pinsch'+ yourself in the arm and pay homage pupil
It's me, my honesty's brutal
But it's honestly futile if I don't utilize what I do though
for good at least once in a while
so I wanna make sure somewhere in this chicken scratch I scribble and doodle
enough rhymes to, maybe try to help get some people through tough times
But I gotta keep a few punchlines just in case, cause even you unsigned
rappers are hungry lookin at me like it's lunchtime
I know there was a time where once I
was king of the underground but I still rap like I'm on my Pharoahe Monch grind
So I crunch rhymes, but sometimes, when you combine
appeal with the skin color of mine, you get too big and here they come tryin
to censor you like that one line I said on "I'm Back" from the Mathers LP 1 when I
tried to say I'll take seven kids from Columbine
Put 'em all in a line, add an AK-47, a revolver and a nine
See if I get away with it now that I ain't as big as I was, but I'm
morphin into an immortal comin through the portal
You're stuck in a timewarp from 2004 though
And I don't know what the fuck that you rhyme for, you're
pointless as Rapunzel with fuckin, cornrows
You write normal, fuck being normal
And I just bought a new ray gun from the future just to come and shoot ya like when Fabolous made Ray J mad
Cause Fab said he looked like a fag at Mayweather's pad singin to a man while he played piano
Man oh man, that was the 24/7 special on the cable channel
So Ray J went straight to the radio station the very next day, "Hey Fab
I'ma kill you!" Lyrics comin at you at +Supersonic+ speed - J. J. Fad
Uhh, samma lamma dooma lamma, you assumin I'm a human, what I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman?
Innovative and I'm made of rubber so that anything you say is ricochetin off of me and it'll glue to you and
I'm devastating, more than ever demonstrating how to give a motherfuckin audience a feelin like it's levitating
Never fading and I know the haters are forever waiting for the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating
Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated, I make elevating music, you make elevator music
"Oh, he's too mainstream!" Well that's what they do when they get jealous, they confuse it
"It's not hip-hop, it's pop!" Cause I found a hella way to fuse it
with rock, shock-rap with Doc, throw on "Lose Yourself" and make 'em lose it
"I don't know how to make songs like that, I don't know what words to use"
Let me know when it occurs to you while I'm rippin any one of these verses that versus you
It's curtains, I'm inadvertently hurtin you; how many verses I gotta murder to
prove that if you were half as nice at songs you can sacrifice virgins too?
Unhh~! School flunky, pill junkie
But look at the accolades these skills brung me, full of myself, but still hungry
I bully myself cause I make me do what I put my mind to and I'm a, million leagues above you
Ill when I speak in tongues, but it's still tongue-in-cheek, fuck you
I'm drunk, so Satan take the fuckin wheel, I'm asleep in the front seat
Bumpin Heavy D and the Boys, still +Chunky But Funky+
But in my head there's something I can feel tugging and struggling
Angels fight with devils and, here's what they want from me
They're askin me to eliminate some of the women hate, but if you take into consideration the bitter hatred
I have then you may be a little patient and more sympathetic to the situation and understand the discrimination
But fuck it, life's handin you lemons, make lemonade then
But if I can't batter the women, how the fuck am I supposed to bake 'em a cake then?
Don't mistake him for Satan
It's a fatal mistake if you think I need to be overseas and take a vacation
to trip a-broad, and make her fall on her face and
don't be a retard - be a king? Think not
Why be a King, when you can be a God?