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Artist: First Serve (De La Soul)
Album:  De La Soul's Plug1 & Plug2 Present... First Serve
Song:   Opening Credits
Typed by:

[Intro: Jacob 'Pop' Life]
Yo, I'm telling you man, we can do this man 
It'll be easy! Come on man, it ain't a prison 
It's a college dorm - an ALL-GIRLS college dorm
With two chicks in it who wanna give us some ass!
(What? Okay what bitch you wanna give me some...)

[Deen 'D' Witter]
Yeah, that's my man Jacob, we all call him Pop
For the longest we've been callin him Pop
Shit, I've never called P anything else but that
I heard he got the name from his addiction to poppin bubble wrap
Shoulda been 'cause he popped a LOTTA shit

(Man, you know what my moms would do if I let you 
drag me into this shit and we get caught doin it?)

That's my nigga D - short for Deen
Known each other since Grade 4 
and I've been cheatin off his homework since Grade 5
Yessir, best friends ever since then
I guess I'm the Yang to the nigga Yin 
'cause I always take chances while he's always playin it safe
Yeah, we're different
But the differences seem to compliment everything we do

Yo, Deen Whitter paw, major investment
The first of a litter like a Georgetown mascot
And you Toto stuck in a basket 
and momma made a man of bein stuck with a bastard

Ha~! Good Lord, I was alone in the womb
and so I came out too soon as a preemie
Just so you could see me
To be me is to be in the life of the jam
'Pop' Life y'all, that's who I am

Yessir, crown study it's that old boy grad (yea)
Got up out the hood, I want that dough boy bag
Me and P sign emerge and raise that index boss
Stay heavy like a brand new Chevy truck

What the fuck? I'm not a dreadlock Rasta
Just an asshole who crashed his brother's Mazda (while weeded!)
I proceeded to unjam the door
Limped to the drive-thru, ordered at number four

Drive through hop in parking lot practice
Thou spit the verses if he begat this

Lack this? Most do, so toast to two
who have nuff actions to back this

From the inner city blues to that cactus green
we're gonna stur a bit of milk until we make it cream

Full steam ahead we ahead of the curb

[Deen] (Pop) {both}
It's Deen Witter (Pop Life) {WHO WANT THE FIRST SERVE?}

Yeah, that shit is crazy! Whoo!
Yo-yo the cuts can go right here! (Yeah yeah, that'll be hot)
This fuckin thing has Jam-Master Jay type cuts and shit (True true)
And yo, we should get like about three girls to sing on this shit!

Why you always gotta get chicks like on it?

Yeah man, all the niggaz do that- {*sound of door knocking*}
Yo... is that your moms, man?

[Ma Witter]
Open the do'!

[D]: Yea, moms is knockin 
[P]: Shit!
[Ma]: Open this damn door, Deen!! Who lock this door?!
[D]: {*whispers*} That was you
[P]:  Nah, that was you!
[Ma]: Deen Lamont Witter!
[D]: Yea, ma?
[Ma]: Whatchu doin down there? You drinkin gin and juice?
[P]: I'm 'bout to smoke this WEED!
[D]: Nigga, put the weed away! She might come down here..
[P]: Yeah nigga, don't be so fuckin scared!
[D]: Whatever
[Ma]: You betta not be down there, smokin narcotic
[D]: She drunk
[Ma]: Takin them Ecstasys and Jalils
[P]: Yo, yo moms say you do X?
[D]: Hell naw nigga, you crazy
[P]: So what the fuck is Jalil?!!
[D]: S'all's good, she just like Whodini
[P]: Whodini? {*speaks louder to Ma*} Uhh, it's just Ecstasy, Miss Witter
[Ma]: Who the fuck is that?!! Maurice?!
[P]: Naw, it's Jacob, Miss Witter
[Ma]: JACOB?!
[P]: Yeah!
[D]: Oh.. God..
[Ma]: WHAT do we have here now?
[P]: Oh, she's drunk
[Ma]: Y'all in there rappin, you still at it, huh?
[D]: She 'bout to talk college
[Ma]: Two fools with a college education, what they say? 
      It was all a dream, wasn't it?! 
      I guess y'all two down there still sleep
      I ain't squeeze yo' little ass out of me
      so you go get shot over some East Coast/West Coast pork!
[P]: ..It's actually, BEEF, Miss Witter
[D]: Yo...
[Ma]: Shut the fuck up, Maurice!!
[P]: It's Jacob, Miss Witter
[D]: YO!!
[J]: Not John, not Johnny, not Joe, Jacob
[Ma]: WHAT?! Oh I know your name, boy!
      Now hold on, lemme tell you somethin!
[P]: I mean, you barely know me since the third grade
[D]: Aw, you gotta stop..
[Ma]: Whatchu need to do, is go wrap ya ass around a job call
      and DON'T LET GO!! Ya heard me? Now open this door, Deen!